3. How to have a relationship with a never-apologizing mother?

How to have a relationship with a never-apologizing mother?

My mom is a lot like this. I have asked her why only her feelings matter, which never goes well. If I hurt her feelings, I used to be expected to apologise. If she hurts my feelings, I get her entire medical history plus "I'm sorry I was such a terrible mother." Her medical history (real and self diagnosed via Kindle unlimited) is her excuse for blowing up at family (never acquaintances... Why can't she be as civil to be as she is to her co-workers or neighbors?), being unreasonable, and saying horrible things that I would never say to my worst enemy.

I'm terrible at gray rock and I have trouble with their guilt trips.

I just gave up on expecting apologies. If things are good, great! I have a somewhat normal relationship. If things go badly I've quit apologizing. I WILL NOT reach out first. And if she brings up her excuses, I tell her it's just an excuse. It's not a healthy relationship, but I can't do anything about her or her behavior.

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