I'm [48F] about to have a blow-out fight with my daughter [17F] over where she will go to college

I had this issue with my younger sister. She got into one of the best colleges in the country...with a $5,000 a year scholarship. She was given full scholarships at 5 state universities, including dorm and books at one. Sounds awesome, right? Except the tuition on top of the scholarship at the best school was $40,000. And it was 3,000 miles away from our hometown. My parents didn't really do the college thing, so they didn't know the difference except to tell her "TAKE THE FREE ONE!" I had to be the meanie and talk her out of it, because I took out wayyyyy too many loans getting caught up in the fervor of wanting to go to these bastions of intellectual freedom and in my case my parents waited until my senior year to tell me they couldn't help me pay, and that FAFSA wouldn't give me any money. So I didn't want her to make the same mistake. Showing her the numbers on her proposed debt and degree really helped. I can't link to it, but check out Washington Post's degree/debt calculator. In addition, I would look up some stuff from actual writers about what they think about their degrees--overwhelmingly, they say that life experience and not undergrad was what informed their writing. I thought I would never be published without a degree from one of those schools, but due to life circumstances I pursued a more practical option. And even so, I've done better in my side writing (literary fiction/poetry) career than friends who have degrees in writing and journalism from Ivies. The work is what matters most. It doesn't matter where your degree is from if you don't have the talent, and a degree in writing is more than 75% spent on other classes--literature, other liberal arts, etc. If you JUST want to write, take writing workshops, get a library card, pursue something for your day job that is mildly interesting and doesn't make you want to stab yourself in the face with a pencil. My "life plan" was to go be a barista until I met writing success. I am very, very grateful that I figured out early on that wasn't going to cut it. Unless you are Stephanie Meyer, writing will likely not pay the bills, particularly burdensome student loans, for a very long time. And if you are Stephanie Meyer, you don't need a degree, you just need to have a ~dream~.

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