Hi I felt I needed to respond to this because something somewhat similar happened to me while pregnant. I actually got pregnant with my non abusive ex, who was a rebound from the abusive ex. We did not stay together. While pregnant, my abusive ex came back into my life just to use me then completely discard me. It shattered my heart. I was sick, falling to the floor crying, heartbroken & severely stressed out from month 6+ of my pregnancy through basically the first year of my sons life. I had PPD. My son is perfectly fine, & I’m ok too, but the guilt is horrendous. I understand. You will be ok! Congrats on becoming a mother. Guilt is now forever a part of your life in almost everything you do as a mom. Even if your son wasn’t small, you’d find something else to feel guilty about. You were a victim. Not a monster trying to hurt your baby. I know you already know this, but now is the time to separate yourself for this person. If you feel like you can’t do it, do it for your son because that toxic abusive person in your life will mess him up more than anything you ever do. You’ve got this. You be a good mother