Let's Pour One Out for Paul Ryan, the Biggest. Fake. Ever.

Paul Ryan was randomly in my economy class on a flight. He had three guards sit in a triangle around him. I was the closest "civilian" to him on the whole plane. Why was he flying economy? Idk, he looked straight up uncomfortable and mad the entire flight. I smiled and nodded at him.

Several people came up, asked for a photo, said a few words but mostly let him be.

When we were preparing to land I got up, went to the bathroom, played around with my swampy ass junk (4 hour plane rides get swanky), came out and asked to shake his hand.

He smiled and I smiled. I thanked him for his work in the house, but ended with "Planned Parenthood is actually a pretty good organization."

He didn't respond. Just nodded and shook the next hand.

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