I live in a dorm with my abuser

I will say this in support of you...I understand your pain. I was recently in an abusive relationship where I was mentally, emotionally and verbally abused consistently by two members of one family. These two appear to be all sweet and engaging around others bbut in private settings they are pure mean and evil. Though one of them was more manipulating and degrading and would insult me and be rude in front of family and close friends. Guess they thought it made them look in control and cool. Anyway, I started to feel like you...no hope, and falling into victim mode where I felt I could do no netter or no one would believe me.

So I noticed when he would deliberately start in on me I saw him secretly recording my reactions to his games. And I started turn on the recorder in my phone to catch him verbally assaulting me. And as for the other person, I recorded conversations, and also caught conversations with both of them and their disgusting conversations. I now understood what kind of sociopaths I was dealing with and took action. I had my back-up proof, so if they started their bullying with me again...I had proof. It maybe hard in your case, but record the abuse with your phone. Take video, or whatever you have to do. Do not find yourself alone with him if you can help it. And if people he is connected with are ones he is saying things to, or are in on the abuse...stay away. But for now do as I did, empower yourself...go to a school counselor and talk about it on record just in case. I am healing, but even after my relationship was over, my ex continued the abuse via text...pulling me back in, then emotionally screwing me over and over. My fault, but what he and his family member did to me is documented and because of who they portray themselves to be in public no one really knows what kind of shit they do and say in private or family settings. And if your friends are noticing you are not yourself, then it is affecting you. Seek help, get proof if you can for your sanity...even a daily journal. I could not believe that I allowed my abuse to carry on for years. But looking back in my journals and finally listening to the recordings...hard to believe people this mean and judgmental exist. And these were privileged people...but extremely spoiled manipulators who if they could not get what they wanted...tormented others.

/r/offmychest Thread