You are going to have a very hard time convincing him that you do want him as you continue to insist that he does all the work and you never ever take any active role. If he chooses not to initiate and wait for when and if you ever initiate yourself, then you two will simply never have sex ever again. It's been one-sided for so long, he finally figured out that you have zero active desire for him. No one wants an unresponsive dead fish, so he stopped trying - it's not as if you'd pick up where he left off, right, and it's not really worth it to him. The difficulty and cost of dealing with it is simply greater than not bothering anymore. He knows it's for nothing.

It's quite simple - no one would believe you if you claim you want it (sex with him), because a) you don't and b) if all you ever do is wait for him to make a move, reject him half the times, and lie back and do nothing the other half the times, he already knows that you simply do not desire him enough to actually make your own move on him.

I think trying to convince him with your words how your consistent and proven lack of initiative and proactive sexual desire are "not real" or "not true" will simply backfire. He knows these things are true, he knows you only have empty words for him with no action behind them ever. And he no longer wants the empty words. Who cares if you say you "love him", he has already seen with his own eyes that you have to be drunk to even want him at all. He can tell that the alcohol is there to help you get yourself to have sex with a guy you simply wouldn't fuck sober.

It's okay. You can stop pretending this relationship is real and that your lack of lust for him means nothing at all. I think he is ready to stop pretending too. It's a good thing. At least you can be honest with each other.