My boyfriend matched in his second to last rank. I feel for you and am really really struggling with everything at the moment. It was the only place on his list that is in the absolute middle of nowhere while we both were born and raised in New York City. He is graduating from a top tier med school with good grades, stuff published, and a great mentor. Everyone was saying how a strong candidate he was, no question he’ll match in his top 3. He’s now thinking he should have just gone unmatched.

I’m trying to be supportive and I’m saying “congratulations” and “I’ll figure it out” but the tears just keep coming. I have a career in finance here, friends, family, savings for a condo near my loved ones. My partner and I love trying new restaurants weekly, cooking internationally, going to concerts, and traveling. This school is his desired specialty but low ranked and I simply cannot see us being happy there.

He is sobbing and saying he had the next six years planned out including proposing to me... and it’s all ruined because he has to choose between his career and everything else. He feels like he “dragged me into this mess” and it’s all his fault. I certainly don’t blame him but everything is just so messed up. We are so depressed and can’t eat or sleep.

In the past twelve hours my brain has gone haywire calculating how I can possibly make this work. I can’t. There is no major city within a commutable distance of his match. Even if my company allows me to take my job remote permanently, I think I will go crazy working from home alone, waking up to him gone and then staring at the wall waiting for him to come home. I’ll try to make friends with neighbors but the population there is literally like 10k people plus college students at the undergrad nearby.

6 years of long distance relationship is not acceptable either when you’re trying to get married and have kids in the next three years.

I’m so lost