Sounds like your mom should lecture less and listen more. Sorry you have to deal with that. The one thing that I also find to be perhaps odd, is the use of they/them. These are plural pronouns, that refer specifically to plurality. To me it's like saying one is two. My disagreeing with using that pronoun has nothing whatsoever to do with sexuality, or even people in general. If you told me your name was Mark Jenny, I'd call you that, but I'm not going to say, 'they went to the store' when it's one person. That's not how I speak. No matter what I think though, if you were my kid, all I'd want you to know is that I love you. It's sad that our opinions and fears can harm that simple message.