Thanks a lot for that.

Years ago, when I didn't maybe have the thinking tools I have now, I couldn't sit still without distraction for more than five minutes because painful thoughts would always rear their heads. Nowadays, I do what you describe - I experience the emotion instead of running away. Sort of viewing it as a physical sensation. Then eventually, I begin to question it. There's four main questions or perspectives that I sometimes use.

• What are my judgements about the thing that's bothering me? (Anger / affinity).
• How do I expect the thing that's bothering me to be affected by me? (Guilt / hope for others)
• What are my judgements about myself in relation to whatever's bothering me? (Shame (depression) / pride).
• How do I expect to be affected by whatever's bothering me? (Anxiety / hope).

Usually, when I run the painful thoughts through this system during a 'meditation', it eases the pain a lot. I think it's because I notice inconsistencies in the way I think and this makes me realise that I don't actually have any reason to be either anxious or hopeful or depressed or proud or whatever. I.e. that the 'here and now' is the state of happiness. I think positive thoughts are just as questionable as negative ones because I think that reality always wins in the end and if a positive thought conflicts with reality, that can be painful. E.g. I might think I'm great at something which gives me hope but in reality no one cares so then that story I'm telling myself is rubbished by reality and that can be very painful, it can lead to anger, guilt etc. So if I can question the positive stories, it can head that problem off at the pass, maybe.

That said, I do have the occasional positive affirmation too, if only to counter the negative ones.

I agree re figuring things out. I think it's a way to 'work smart'. I find I can solve or develop technical issues re my work or life which ends up saving time and prevents going down blind alleys a bit which is nice.

Re the night, I find if I'm kept awake by my thoughts, I use it as an opportunity to do this 'meditation without meditating', i.e. sitting up awake and eventually whatever is bothering me eases.

Also, I think the reason why people don't do this kind of thing more or talk about it is because it's so basic. There is literally nothing to teach so nobody can instruct or be a guru. All people can do is share their experiences.

Cheers. :)