I have very few expectations, and don't try not to put my worth on the opinions of others. Enjoying myself, and experiencing new things, is what I want to do. That means experiencing pain, discomfort, joy and love.

Once you start to expect too much of yourself, you're going to find you feel inadequate. You look to find excuses why you can't reach your goals- someone is holding you back, you don't have enough money or time. The truth is, things take longer than you expect. That's it. You can do anything with enough time. It's just got to be time well spent.

If you put your self worth on the opinions and reactions of others, your emotions are no longer within your control. It's like moving your centre of gravity beyond you legs, letting other hold you. You don't have control. You're constantly worried about being a failure if you perceive negative emotions towards you.

I had relapsed, in a sense, and held part of my happiness in what my fiancee thought of me. Which I guess is part of being in love. When planning the wedding, and being under so much stress herself, she wasn't showing me the same affection she had, it really started to work me up. I'm working through this at the moment by trying to destress the situation for her, but also not expect as much attention as I had when we: Didn't have full time jobs and, didn't have 2 weddings with international guests and a Honeymoon to plan.