I don't think she intended to actually pay me either, looking back. I agree that opening at 2k was probably overwhelming, but I did calculate it all out and the hourly rate plus travel fees and post processing really did break down to being that much. Maybe I should have laid it out like that, breaking down exactly where I got that amount from.
When we sat down and discussed the flowers it was mostly between me and her mom. I asked her 5 different times that night how much she wanted to spend on flowers and each time she said, "money is no object." Which is another reason why I thought asking for $2,000 wasn't all that absurd.
Honestly when I quoted her the $4,000 I was expecting to open up a negotiation and for her to try and slice the price in half, which I would have been totally okay with. The entire problem I have is that she just refuses to talk to me about money at all. Just last night she texted me and said, "I don't like negotiating money with people, friends or not. I don't feel comfortable at all." Even if she said that my boyfriend and I were each getting $300 I'd be fine with that, I just need to know before hand so that I can plan accordingly. Instead of firing me on the spot literally all she had to do was tell me her price.
My boyfriend and I would actually be getting the exact same amount for the photography, he is good friends with this family as well and she specifically asked for both of us to shoot her wedding. I should have explained some of the aspects of this story better but I was furious and trying to keep it short. It would be $1,000 for each of us for photos and like $1,300 for me for the flowers. I've already put 12+ hours into the flowers with planning and ordering and going to the wholesale house to get supplies (which is an hour away from my house) so I figured and extra $300 was pretty fair.
Anyway, I have definitely learned my lesson. She actually texted me again and my normal self would have bent over backwards and probably badgered her some more but she again said she was going to find someone else so all I said was, "alright," and left it at that. As mad and hurt as I still am I do feel like a big weight has been lifted off my shoulders.
Thank you so much for taking the time to read my post and respond. I really appreciate your opinion and am definitely taking it to heart and trying to improve my behaviors for next time.