I really relate with this. I’ve been with my boyfriend for 5+ years now and it’s so similar. Lots of love, I do enjoy cuddles and non-sexual affection, cats together, best friends, awesome conversations, etc. but I want nothing to do with his body. When he hugs me and becomes aroused (I feel him pressing against me) I’m repulsed. I don’t mean to be... I love him... but I just am. We’ve had sex probably a total of 10 times in the last year and a half... and it has been uncomfortable for me to say the least. I’ve never had an orgasm before during with a guy. I used to really be into feeling wanted; being seductive; getting guys to want to have sex with me... but once it was time for the actual sex I wished I could escape. Worried I’m a lesbian too because I love my man so much but this just isn’t healthy or sustainable...