Oh it's horribly abusive. Basically they've been dating since HS and once during their transition from HS to college he tried to end it and she threatened to kill herself. They were like 18 at the time. Fast forward to a couple years ago, she has a great job and makes a ton of money. She supported him through the end of his schooling. Once he didn't need her money anymore, he kicked her out of the home that they shared and she had to move into a one bedroom apartment by herself (even though her name was still on the lease to the old place) because he needed more "space." Basically he turned the place into a revolving door of women and told the girl that he would come to her new place to see her when he wanted to, otherwise she should stay away from the old place.

So she gets bored and starts seeing a coworker. Dude flips out and demands that she break up with him or he'll stop talking to her forever. So she caves and stops seeing him. Meanwhile her "bf" continues to live bachelor life and see a multitude of other women of "the roster" as he calls it.

Clearly she could do without him at this point but they've been together almost a decade and she thinks if she hangs on he'll eventually have finished sowing his oats and be with her exclusively. He's basically tricked her into believing that will happen when in actuality he told us that he would never consider exclusivity with her unless she loses 30 lbs. She used to want to get married and have children but he manipulated her into wanting what he wants which is none of that.

I used to feel sorry for her, but I tried to talk to her about it once and let's just say it went absolutely horribly and of course she ended up staying.