You guys often invoke "trained" like it's a synonym of "magical".

A lot of gun owners train far more than most police officers, let alone private security guards do.

There's not some secret sauce that these guys get let on to that civilians can't access. They aren't Navy SEALs.

Do you think that guards are somehow put through years of psychological classified training methods that allow them to perform superhuman acts of control and accuracy like some character from a movie? Gun Kata from Equilibrium?

It's not true. Most LEOs are lucky if they hit the range once a month for half an hour. (Ask a cop. Really.)

But I know you guys tend to think that once someone becomes law enforcement they're bestowed superhuman powers of judgment and skill.

But I know, I know. The police are the "Only Ones" who should have guns. Because they're basically real-life superheroes, don't you know.

If you live 30 minutes from police response and end up the victim of a home invasion - well. Tough. I guess. Just cooperate with the criminals, because they're only trying to get by and their goodwill can be counted on.

And there's always an asterisk. You guys say "Nobody wants to take your guns!" - *(Unless it has a adjustable stock and plastic handguards - you're evil if you have one of those, and that goes without saying.)

Just be honest for once. Say that you want firearms confiscated from everyone but the police, unless they're made of wood and you're a hunter.

Or are rich, or a celebrity.