Applying the hand brake Attacking the one-eyed purple-headed warrior Auditioning the finger puppets Beats his meat Beef-stroke-it-off Blowing the barn Bludgeoning the beefsteak Bobbing your boloney Bopping Richard Bopping the bishop Bopping the Bonzo Boxing the bald champ Buffing the banana Burping the worm Buttering the corn Charms the python Checking for testicular cancer Choking Kojak Choking the chicken Choking the sheriff and waiting for the posse to come Churning your butter Clobbering the Kleenex Clubbing the clam Cooking the cream of cock Corralling the tadpoles Cranking the shank Defrosting the fridge Doin' The Solitary Rhumba Doing the five-knuckle shuffle Doing the pork sword jiggle Electing the president Engaging in safe sex Escorting the one-eyed postal worker Faxing the Pope Feeding the ducks Firing the flesh musket Flogging the frog Fly fishing Fondling the fig Getting a date with Slick Mittens Getting a grip on things Grappling the gorilla Greases his pole Greasing the pipe Gripping the pencil Hacking the hog Holding the sausage hostage Jacking off Jerkin' the gherkin Jerking the turkey Kicking your roommate out for five to ten minutes to 'call your parents' Kneads his knob Lubing the Tube Making the scene with the magazine Massages the half-blind ostrich Milking the moose Molesting the mole Mounting a corporal One gun salute Paddling the pickle Palming the calm Patting the penis Perling the oyster Petting the lizard Picking the pepper Pipping the pumpkin Playing pocket pinball Playing a game of Backstroke roulette Pounding your flounder Pounds the tube steak Pulling your goalie Pumping the gas at the self-service island Pumping the stump Punishes the one-eyed pirate Ringing in the new year Roughing the suspect Sail captain happy Saps the schlong Shooting the pocket rocket launcher Spanks the monkey Spouting old faithful Strokes his boy Tutoring the pupil Tweaking the tucan Wacks his willy