Because trauma in this case doesn’t necessarily mean what we classically think of as trauma, ie a dramatic event or abuse.

I am in the same boat as you, but also have all of the above listed traits, and I’ve been seeing a psychologist for over a year to try and fix myself.

As babies, and small children, we absorb everything our parents do or say, and that affects how we grow. Some of those behaviours may mould us into how we are today even if it wasn’t our parents intentions to mistreat us.

In my example, my parents always made me feel like I wasn’t good enough, like nothing I ever did was of value, that I wasn’t of value, and they never believed anything I said. With rare exceptions they never actually said that out loud, but for all my childhood that’s how they made me feel. And so now as an adult I unconsciously tell myself those things.

I didn’t have a traumatic upbringing but I have the similar signs of someone who may have.