I'm losing my mind thinking that my family is falling apart, quite literally, right before my eyes. My cousin, who I grew up with very closely, tried to get in touch with me recently. Last I heard of her was she tried to murder my aunt, she's riddled with HIV and MRSA. Nobody is questioning how long she's had HIV, but it matters because she has a daughter. The DEA showed up recently for this specific cousin, and I guess it was afterwards that she contacted me. Not too sure what I can do about that, but all I WANT to do is adopt her daughter and remove her from this environment. I'm not financially set up so that's a no go. It breaks my heart that her daughter has to grow up with a homicidal tweaker for a mother. I recently cut ties with my best friend and I miss her like crazy. But shes proven herself disloyal plenty of times so I don't know why I miss her. I guess I miss the old times. A friend of mine is in prison for murder. It makes me question my own character because I still see him as who he was before, just now, he had to make a decision that either way would've ended with someone dying. I hate going on social media because it makes me angry, and envious, to see everyone else so happy and set up. Meanwhile, everything just goes wrong for me. It's not a pity party either, it's legitimately that I have the worst luck in the world. I get a car, it breaks down. I get money back in taxes to fix up my car. The money gets stolen and the car gets more broken than before. I get multiple jobs that end with someone threatening me, or sexually harassing me.

What in the hell am I doing wrong? Every day I wake up, ready for the new day to begin, and they all just end the same way.