Who is the ugliest person that you would have sex with?

There was this girl I was really crushin' on my freshman year of college. Her name was Hope. So we did our little flirting thing, and I think I missed my chance and got friendzoned. So, my teenage brain thought the next best thing would be to flirt with her friend, Sarah. Sarah is clearly into me, but she's not really attractive. I thought that if Hope saw her friend flirting with me, she'd get jealous and want me. This leads to the roadtrip.

Hope and Sarah were friends from back home, and they invited me to visit, hang out at their pool, drink, relax, etc. Couldn't hurt, I thought. So we drive up, and we're hanging out at Hope's parent's house. We're impatiently awaiting them to leave so that we can start drinking (we weren't 21 yet, and Hope's parents didn't let her drink). Finally, they leave. We're hanging out drinking by the pool. Nice day, having fun. Girls go swimming and I walk back into the kitchen to grab another beer. I see Hope's phone.

Someone sent her a message saying "Hey Hopie, missing you already <3<3<3." So I thought 'who the fuck is this.' Their name was just some stupid Emojis so I had no idea who it was. I get the bright idea to take out my phone and text the number saying "Hopie's phone died, this is Rlight." They respond "OH Rlight! You're the cute boy with Hopie. This is Becca." I'm immediately thinking to myself - who the fuck is Becca!? So she starts texting me dirty shit, and I'm texting back dirty stuff. She sends me a picture of her in a bikini with her head cropped out. Etc. Meanwhile the girls have been in the pool for what must've been like 30 minutes. I'm sitting in the kitchen with a tent in my pants only wearing a swimsuit. Hope comes in.

Wanting to shove the flirtation in her face, I say "who is Becca?" and show her the picture on my phone. She screams "WHAT THE FUCK?! WHAT THE FUCK IS THAT!?" Continues screaming and storms off. Sarah comes in having heard the commotion and now I'm just confused and lost. I explain everything to sarah and she looks at me and says - "Holy shit, you wanted to fuck Hopie's mom."

/r/AskReddit Thread