This is complicated and it really seems pointless to frame the world only in what men's expectations are vs. women's what is misogyny vs. what isn't misogyny, etc.

People like different things. Some men are attracted to a more fit body and some like a more curvy or even overweight or obese body. If your goal is simply to be attractive to men then your best bet is probably to aim for a body type that is not considered overweight but also not skin and bones.

With that being said, if attracting men isn't your primary goal in life, then why do you even care what men think? Who cares if men are concerned about how flat your stomach is? It's not misogyny for men to have standards. No one is forcing anyone to live up to it. You aren't going to get thrown in jail for not being considered hot by men. Do what you want.

It's ridiculous that when men have standards for who they want to date and have sex with it's called misogyny but it's not called anything when women don't open themselves up to free use by fat, sweaty neckbeards in anime shirts. Both men and women have standards when it comes to romantic partners and it's normal. The public schools need to start beating this idea out of people that they can bend reality to their will with magic words. Like all the nasty neckbeards can get women to fuck em if they start protesting about body-odor-phobia or something. It's not misogyny if a man doesn't want to be with an obese woman. That's just normal, natural shit.