Thomas Bradley had nothing left to live for.
He had been aware of that cold, hard fact for nearly two years, and his brain would remind him every day of all the reasons why life just wasn't worth living.
It was a voice in the back of his head that would say things like, "Your parents think you're a failure," and, "No girl has ever truly love you," and, "No matter how much you think you might matter in this world, you're not even a speck of dust in the grand scheme of the universe," just to name a few of the big things, but sometimes it was the small things that would sting the most. It was the voice that reminded of him of that time in 8th english class when he went to ask his middle school crush to the dance by putting a big teddy bear on her desk with the a note that said, "I would be BEARY happy if you went to the dance with me," and that voice reminded him of how she just laughed and laughed. That voice reminded him of the stares he got from the class the rest of the day and how just wanted to slump far into his desk and disappear.  And now, 14 years later, that voice continues to remind him of such a small memory that show-cased one of Tom's many failures. He knew deep down she probably wouldn't even remember such a thing, but he did, and that's the only thing that seemed to matter to him. Tom was reminded of that incident everyday along with 28 years of other stupid shit he had done.
And after failing out of college, and getting fired from his job at a construction company for not staying on top of deadlines, Thomas had spent the past two years living in an apartment by himself while he flipped burgers at Applebees. He never hung out with anyone. He never tried to ask anyone to go anywhere. Getting out of the house had become a foregin concept to Thomas, instead every night he would go home by himself and do whatever he could to silence that persistent voice that would constantly remind him of what a failure he was. It was mostly alcohol, but on a few, very happy, occassions he got his hands on the more powerful drugs that were out there. Cocaine had always been his favorite, until one special night Adam from his job had hooked him up with some heroin, and it was like nothing he had every experienced.