So your wife got fat... Have you tried the "compliment" diet?

I don't know what there's more of here: armchair psychology, bad assumptions, or semi-colons.

you clearly don't seem to even like babies

No, I don't like babies. I like children just fine. That's the thing that's great about babies. If you're not a dog person and you get a dog, the dog will stay a dog forever and you've made a bad choice. If you're not a baby person and you have a baby, the baby grows up into a child who can actually interact with you on a level that's more meaningful than crying and shitting, which is what newborns do. If you don't have any of your own, then let me remind you: they don't even start smiling at you until they're 3 months old.

I have a 4 year old who's absolutely great, and the baby is now 9 months old and has learned to wave and clap and he's turning from obnoxious baby to almost-toddler and is starting to actually get fun.

your relationship is clearly getting toxic with your resentment and her potential insanity

Clearly. You should win a Nobel prize if you can infer all of that from one post on the internet where I complained that my wife hasn't lost her baby weight and probably had some PDD with our first son 4 years ago.

and you clearly would rather keep your money and be miserable than get a divorce and potentially be more happy.

I don't spend any of "my" money as it is. I don't even have access to our online bank. My wife pays all the bills. Somehow you've garnered that I'd be more happy if I ran off on my family because my wife needs to lose weight? Your powers of deduction are truly staggering. Please, tell me more about me.

If there's something I fucking hate, its the guy who whiiiiines that he has to pay up for his own goddamn children.

If there's something I fucking hate, it's divorce lawyers. A guy I worked with a couple years back divorced his wife and the first thing his wife's divorce lawyer told her to do was to quit her job so that she would appear needier and get a bigger child support payment and a bigger alimony check.

I guess it doesn't connect with you that a father might hate the fact that he has to give 70% of his gross income - whether that's $700 or $7000 - to his wife and if he's lucky see his kids on the weekends. And a lot of these guys who are doing this are probably dealing with future ex-wives who actively do what they can to turn their kids against their father. I've heard the stories. In my cases, first-hand. It's horrible. There are few situations in this life worse than being a child-support slave with partial or no custody.

Guess what, special snowflake? Maybe you should've thought of that BEFORE having more children after when you can barely afford one.

I could afford 10 children. I make a lot of money. That's not a problem.

Maybe you should've thought of that BEFORE she sacrificed her career to take care of the kids as a housewife.

Before we got married, she told me that what she wanted was to be a stay at home mom, and I didn't want kids raised by day care. Agreeing on that is something we did before we even contemplated marriage.

But you wouldn't know any of that from a 3 fucking paragraph Reddit comment on /r/fatlogic/, would you, Sherlock?

She didn't love her job, but having it gave her impetus to stay in shape and gave her a routine: gym in the morning, work after. Routine changes are hard, even when the routine sucks (e.g., the routine of prison life changing when released).

So yeah, considering she stayed at home for YOUR kids,

Also hers. Next.

I find its fucking insulting when the man suddenly says 'but but but why doesn't she get a joooob?'

If I were to initiate a divorce, then yes, it would be kind of insulting. However, isn't the statistic something like 66% of divorces are instigated by a woman? If my wife instigated divorce proceedings against me, and expected me to still finance every single aspect of her (now independent) life as well as the kids? Child support, sure. But she wants alimony too so that she can stay at home while I work, and deprive me of my family? If you think that's insulting then there's no chance a single part of this thread is going to reach you in any meaningful way.

real need or not having enough health/education to take care of herself

The US courts frequently use language like, "kept in the manner to which she is accustomed" - in other words, "take care of herself" is relative. My wife drives a nice car which my job pays for. If we divorced, the courts would use that car payment in computing alimony, even though she could easily buy a much less nice car for much less cost (you know, like most people drive).

My wife does not have the capacity to fund the lifestyle that I provide her. Not even close. But she has a college degree and she could live plenty well on the child support and money from the job she could get based on how much she made before we had kids. But the courts would award her most of my salary as alimony because it's "not fair" that a divorce should bump her down a few pegs socially, even if she instigates the divorce. These facts are hard to believe but I've seen it happen to actual people I've worked with within the last five years.

Its high, because the parent with primary custody has the kid around 24/7, and the snacks and soccer and whatever the fuck kids do adds up in costs.

Again, it's proportional to the payer's income. The court will not award my wife child support based on how much a median-income family in the US spends to raise one child. The court will award child support based on how much I can afford, which is not based on my current employment status but rather the average that I've earned over the last five years (otherwise, too many ex-husbands would just quit their jobs to spite their ex-wives). Just look at Britney Spears and K-Fed. He took the kids and Britney was paying something like $20,000 per month because she can afford it.

If you had primary custody, she'd have to pay for pension and it would be the same thing.

No, she would pay nothing, as she is unemployed, has been unemployed for the last 4 years, and even when she was working, she made less than a quarter of what I make, and therefore the court would rule that her entire income would have to go to her own upkeep.

But you won't listen to me.

You're right, because you haven't said a single thing that is either truthful or correct.

You are going to have the third child,

We'll see.

get a divorce anyway,

No, because I love my wife, I love my family, and as I think I've demonstrated, divorce is a pretty stupid choice. The only thing I've said at all in this thread or elsewhere on Reddit is that I am unhappy that my wife needs to lose weight, and every time I've ever talked about divorce, it's been in a hypothetical context a la, "even if I wanted to get a divorce, I wouldn't because..."

then whine away at reddit about how that evil whore of an ex wife 'stole' 'your' house and 'your money'.

Right. The house that my income alone affords and the money that I solely earn. Of course it's also hers because we're married. Once we're no longer married neither of those things is true anymore. I know that's a very hard concept to understand - I guess if you are as you claim a divorce lawyer (although in reality, you sound like a teenager), the only way you'd be able to ever represent a woman in a divorce proceeding and not hate yourself is to view the world with the idea that once a man puts a ring on a woman's finger she owns him for the rest of her life even if she decides she doesn't want to keep up her end of the bargain. I'm a much simpler person. Being married to me entitles you to share in everything that is mine. Not being married to me does not entitle you to anything. Being my child entitles you to my financial support. Not being my child doesn't entitle you to anything. I'm still waiting for the day that a cohesive flaw in that argument will be presented. I welcome you to try.

TL;DR - you assume a lot and you're unequivocally wrong on every point. Thanks for trying, though.

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