I think I've given myself an eating disorder with keto.

Have done keto and low-carb mostly since February 2017 as a response to being type 2 diabetic.

It's been fantastically effective, and I went from an initial 254 to around 195, still 20 pounds more than my realistic goal weight.

But over the years, every time I get strict about macros/super-low carbs, I start to become repulsed and unable to eat all the standard keto foods. Meat/fish/chicken starts to gag me and the sight/smell makes me unable to keep it in my refrigerator. Dairy might as well be vomit, I can't even look at heavy cream, sour cream, cream cheese, etc. Non-starchy vegetables start to taste like cardboard, and I can't eat anything. When I look at animal products, all I can see are dead animals and abused animals.

I've become good at fasting and can go 48 hours like most keto people skip breakfast. But with nothing keto-friendly I can make myself eat, I binge on non-keto foods until I'm in a carb stupor, stay there for a few days. Fast a few days to try to start over, binge again...

I'm so sick of this, my weight bounces around up and down 10 pounds, but it's very unhealthy, I know. I just don't know how to get into a place where I can eat keto. It's the only thing that's ever allowed me to control my weight.

I didn't put this on the front page, because I'm not sure this is relevant or appropriate. If not, tell me and I'll delete it.