I've experienced some of the same things. I'm the only child of extremely religious older parents, one of whom is not in good health, and they have spent my life guilt-tripping me into decisions. I feel this huge weight of responsibility on myself to make them happy (they also have no friends), and it's just so hard to let that go and live for myself. They revile people who live together before marriage. I can remember them talking shit about anyone they knew that were "living in sin" far back into my childhood. They'd rather I told them I was gay, or a democrat...

I have lived with my boyfriend in the past for a few years, however. There's a popular street on my campus that is just full of old houses that function as apartments. We actually moved together and my parents didn't know about it. Later I told them that he had moved in the same house because of some landlord issues. My dad had a fit but I kept telling him how safe I felt with him around, and he let it go. There were also some other people in the house, and it was good to have them around when they were visiting. When they came, I'd go around and pack his stuff up into boxes and shove them into an empty room (I tried to keep his things neat and easy to access, throwing away any junk he didn't need anymore).

It was annoying, but worth the sacrifice. Living together was a really good experience for both of us, and made us stronger. I'd suggest going this route if you can, rather than picking out a small single apartment. Roommates can be annoying and messy, so do that at your own risk, of course. I'd be lying if I said we weren't sometimes tired of living with other people in places that needed repairs. We're students and used to a lower standard of living empty laugh. I'd also suggest moving away to another place, the farther the better, or, if you just can't, have a friend who can cover your back and act as your roommate.

Sadly, though, I'm at the end of my master's degree and both of us are looking to move to another city together (a big city with no houses close by like this). We want to get married in the future, but get settled and get jobs first so we can have a nice wedding on our own time later. I'm not sure how things are going to work out yet...if we are pushed to get married as soon as I graduate, it will be some kind of civil ceremony (am I using the right words? idk). I'm not really sure how my parents feel about that right now. I'm not going to be talked into one of those "church service weddings", so maybe it would be for the best.