I know what social security is for. I used the analogy of the inheritance (which apparently did not get across the way I intended since people seem to think I believe government benefits constitute a trust fund) as an example of how a kid would feel shafted to know their caregiver actively avoids spending "their" money on them.

It's a generosity that apparently the OP doesn't have. She's not hurting for money, but she'd rather whine about how those kids are gonna be ok, man, and she suffered her whole tragic life and now she wants to reap the benefits man, and don't tell me what effect that has on anyone else.

If I were less jaded about man, I would not be able to understand how she could be so obviously blinded to the resentment she is fostering, and exhibiting, in this scenario. Making people feel like they aren't wanted, and are a burden, is not a feeling that will just go "oh ok" when you break it down into the legalities of a payout, and the percentage of the costs. Who the fuck cares what it costs. You are not hurting for money, your life will not be drastically or even significantly altered by the expense of these children. Like I said, yes, that is a generosity, and no one is entitled to anyone's generosity. But accept the role you are playing in it, and that you are getting what you get in return for it.