Did you know that your friend is a rapist? With his friendly smile and his sparkly eyes that defies her request for him to STOP. With his bar-room jokes and his rolled-up smokes that reminds her that her body is his.
No, but since I don't watch my friends have sex with other people, I guess I wouldn't. I had no idea feminists enjoy voyeurism too, but I guess since it's the closest they'll ever get to intimacy I shouldn't be surprised.
Did you know that your colleague is a rapist? With his dodgy back and his decaying breath that communicates her worth.
I don't think it's easy to rape when you've got a bad back, and I didn't think having 'dad' breath automatically made you a rapist either.
With his salary bump and his sullen mood that teaches her to stay quiet.
Salary bump? Is this some kind of self help book? Rape Your Way To Success!
Did you know that your boyfriend is a rapist? With his salty kiss and his bitten nails that scratch along her thighs.
Biting your nails make you a rapist, I bite my nails. I think this 'poem' is trying to tell me something, I can't quite grasp what though.
With his Hallmark cards and his shiny shoes that reflect her fear.
Happy Rape Day, We're Sorry You're Raping
Did you know that your brother is a rapist? With his special tricks and his spiked tongue that drew her blood. With his midnight texts and his weekly reminders.
Jesus, is her brother Nightcrawler or something. Midnight texts? Remember ladies, be in bed by midnight, or the SJW's will get you. And only weekly texts, a text at midnight and once a week is hardly a love bombing campaign. In fact if a girl only got a text at midnight and then another mid-week, she'd probably start pissing and moaning that the guy isn't interested in her.
Did you know that your son is a rapist?
What did you say about my son? I'm beginning to see a pattern here.
With his gentle hugs and his crooked teeth that scarred her face.
Rapists are not known for their gentle hugs.
With his mournful tears that soaked her skin.
Don't cry as a man and your cold and should commit suicide, Cry as a man and you're a rapist, you can't fucking win.
Did you know that your father is a rapist?
Believe it or not, not every girl was raped by her father. I'm seeing some projection here.
With his tender lamb and his nicotine taste that made her sick.
Again with the anti-smoking campaign. You know smoking doesn't brain wash you into becoming a rapist. Neither does cooking your food so it isn't tough as old boot leather.
With his dry skin and his heavy bones that broke her.
Jesus sorry for not moisturising.
Did you know that your husband is a rapist?
Nope but I'm sure you're about to tell me.
With his red roses and his 2.4 kids that made it her fault.
2.4? What happened to the other 1/6th of a child? Was it divided up at King Solomons palace or something? Why do I doubt the writer of this poem has ever received any roses.
With the loving hands that he used to choke her.
That's what you get for marrying Cheryl Tunt.
Did you know that you are a rapist?
I had no idea, what do I win?
With your tactile strokes and your trips in the car.
Learn to drive then, it's easy, Clutch, change gear and all that.
With your sweat that falls into her mouth.
OK, from now on every Tuesday can be reverse cowgirl night.
With your presents and your gifts and your cards.
Well I kept the gift receipts, you can take them back any time for a gift you do want.
With the bruises that you created and the blood that stains your bed.
Hey! Not everyone rapes their wives you know.
With the vows that you made and the bones that you break.
Wait, who broke my bones? Was I raped now?
With your holidays, with your cars, with your castles in the sky.
OK, Having a car and going to Epcot, is hardly promising people 'castles in the sky'. I think don't think Clark Gwiswold was promising all that much.
With your desire to make her feel and your need to make her see.
You really shouldn't have married Francis Dolahyde love, big mistake. But this really is more of a 'you' problem.
With your look into her eyes when you decided to ignore her pleas.
Well someone had to tell her that Sex In The City was being cancelled, but it's OK they made two god awful movies.