Here's what I have to say about this.
I am part of the HAES community, not the FA community, although I'm all for equal rights for everyone.
I did not lose a significant portion of my weight during my 100 day experiment (that would be the health challenge in quotes that tahlyn is talking about.) I lost 20 pounds. I know for some of you that's a significant portion--but as we all know, I'm VERY fat and 20 pounds is not a significant portion of my body.
Nothing broke me with regard to HAES. The online HAES community veered more toward social activism than toward the original message of the movement (for lack of a better word) and the blog I wrote for closed up. So I started my own blog and kept writing about HAES in the way that has always made sense to me. The way I believe that it was originally intended. To be very clear, my ideas and beliefs have not changed and I'm certainly not embarrassed by them. I still stand by the idea that healthy behaviors are the goal, and that health cannot be measured by weight alone.
I'm exploring WLS on the advice of my doctor, whose advice I have always taken very seriously. Someone close to me became very ill this year as a result of uncontrolled blood pressure. She's very petite and her particular blood pressure issue is the result of smoking--something I don't do--but it prompted me to see my doctor in the first place. It's been my responsibility to sit with her, sometimes 16 hours a day, due to her dementia, and that made me realize that I need to make sure to stay on top of my health in my 40s so that my 70s are healthy, too. I do not have hypertension or diabetes, but my blood pressure was slightly elevated and I found out that I'm insulin resistant (my body doesn't process insulin properly, which actually causes bouts of hypoglycemia--and could, someday, lead to diabetes.) I also had a sleep study and found out that I have sleep apnea. Sleep apnea runs in my family. I'm the only obese person in my family (see the OP), so I'm not convinced that losing weight will get rid of the problem for me. Maybe it will lessen it, though. Also, my mother died of breast cancer in her 40s, and that is often on my mind. Anyway, I decided to consult with a surgeon and I'm exploring weight loss surgery. I haven't had it, and I haven't decided to have it, although I am leaning in that direction.
Sadly, you did not help me. If anything broke me, it was this forum. I was doing pretty well, exercising nearly everyday, treating myself like an athlete (focused on training, rather than just exercising for the purpose of weight loss) and someone here convinced me I was wrong. And that messed me up for a little bit. I'm back to my old self, swimming with an athletic mindset, but I let one of you get into my head and it caused me to backslide for a while on my goal of becoming healthier and feeling better. It's not easy to admit that I was emotionally weak enough to let an internet troll affect me, but there it is.
I want to make this very clear. I do not believe that HAES precludes weight loss. I have NEVER been anti-weight loss. When I wrote for Fierce Fatties I was very vocal about my efforts that led to some weight loss. While my primary goal is to feel good and to be able to be as athletic as I want to be, I'm well aware that reaching those goals will very likely lead to some weight loss. And I'm aware that the reason I have not met those goals as fully as I want to is because my weight creates a gap between what I want to do and what I can do.
You (the general you, not anyone in particular) are not good with details. Even in the OP, I start out by saying that I'm 5'10" and someone at the bottom says I'm short. Just thought I'd point that out. Some of you are also willful in your misunderstanding of me. To be honest, this makes me wary of answering questions here.
I enjoyed my time here. I thought maybe I could bridge the gap and help some of you understand what HAES really is (reading through your forum this morning, you still really, really don't get it.) I was asked to leave, so I did. I wouldn't have even known about this thread if several people hadn't let me know it was here.
Anyway, if you have questions, you can ask. I can't promise I'll answer them.