While I understand that, it did and was demonstrated it did. I actually have a degree in neuropsych and my thesis was on ADHD, which is why I specified severe ADHD and the ADP. Mild ADHD or certain subtype symptoms wouldn't necessarily impact a student, but it was repeatedly demonstrated mine did.
I was unable to learn in class with the ADP and was forced to learn everything from the text books and hope it overlapped with what was in class. I wasn't taught or aided in how to do this, and while it was a norm in college, as a 14 yr old it was brutal. My school was aggressively competitive, and my freshman classes followed 100 level curriculums (senior year was 200 level). The syllabi did not guide me other than which chapters to focus on and teachers risked getting in trouble giving me guides. I started skipping school to stay home and study, because I was learning so little in class and needed notes to follow a lecture. It also killed my test scores--when teachers let me take a test in a quiet environment, test scores went up and average of 2-3 letters. I needed time to reread questions multiple times to understand what they were asking. My inability to comprehend instructions without a little additional explaining/verification also made me by in constant trouble with less understanding teachers (misunderstanding due dates, wrong style essay, wrong chapter read, etc.). I had no behavioral modification tools in place and teachers did not know what to do to help me. Some were pushing for the IEP for guidance, others shouted at me for being lazy (because of the stark differences in my scoring). One substitute actively humiliated me in front of my peers because she didn't understand the brief explanation in my teacher's notes for her, and mocked me for having made up problems in front of other students.
Most of my teachers liked me very much because they knew how hard I worked, they knew I loved learning and wasn't stupid, and some went out of their way to help, but I needed behavioral modification therapy and established guidelines for those who were less understanding, unaware, or unable to help. Both teachers and multiple psychs (including the district psychologist) demonstrated this and submitted evidence for it.
My point is, and what the director said to my face, was that it didn't matter that I wasn't 'doing well' in class, I needed to fail the majority of my classes to qualify. It wasn't about helping me learn or improving my coping skills, it was if I failed I would be given more help than I needed. We even tried pushing for assistance that focused solely on improving my ability to learn, not perform, and she rejected those too.
My parents were actually very neglectful/opposite of helicopter parents, and the fact that they were actually involved in it was huge. This wasn't pushing for special snowflake status. We had evidence from professionals in the district that I met the criteria and she was violating their own guidelines.
I know that special Ed is often underfunded and understaffed, but we lived in a well off district that my parents financially sacrificed to have their kids in. The SpEd director was known to cause issues for students. A good friend of my is severely autistic (affecting learning, speech, etc.) and his mother shared horror stories of her own experiences with the director as well. The director would constantly push easier curriculums to raise his grades, rather than want to work with their plan that improved his learning and functionality. She treated him like an infant, rather than a developmentally disabled young adult, and tried to disregard his carefully designed program in favor of him sitting around doing nothing. My sister is actually a special education teacher, and she is constantly frustrated with how her district either ignores student needs, or sets them up for stagnation with lowered expectations.
Sorry if I sound snippy, I sort of feel like you are eager to agree with the other party based on your experiences rather than considering what I wrote. The things you mention I thought I addressed in my first comment(?). I get that I was trying to be concise, so I wasn't as detailed, but considering I mentioned the multiple psych evaluations and how it harmed my performance, it feels like you are implying that we were going off a simple doctor's note. I mean, a large, competitive private university (30K+ students) granted me more help than my high school, and they had stricter requirements to qualify for such assistance. Doesn't that reinforce that, just maybe, the Special Ed director wasn't looking out for my interests? I understand that LDs don't automatically qualify for anything, but by the laws and guidelines where I lived, and the documentation provided by teachers and internal & external psychologists, I did qualify. I mentioned legal aspects because my mother sought legal counsel due to the violation of their own policies (not to sue, but to force investigation into the department or something). We had a case, but she was too lazy/neglectful to pursue it (harsh but true--she said that because I am her only LD kid, it didn't make sense to fight them