Four ER visits in the last year, two of them wanted to admit me but i wasn’t insured at the time (thanks USA) - all gave ativan to help me calm the fuck down. The hallucinations have shook me the worst. Mostly auditory, mostly people talking shit about me, or songs that don’t exist but could literally be played on the radio. Or the lady mocking me from my parents’ downstairs halfbath walls. Eventually taught myself to get the sounds to repeat, as a test to know it wasn’t real. Have seen the bugs, large and small, crawling and flying. The worst of that was the spidery one that kept crawling on the glass of water i was trying to drink.

Seizure-wise haven’t had 911 called on me - yet, but there was one scary point on the 20 minute drive to my boyfriends that my hands froze. Annoyed several drivers while attempting to get into the nearest parking lot, and waited about 5 minutes til i could pry them off the wheel and use my knuckles to touch my phone. Promptly stopped for 1.5L wine at the next light.

Otherwise mentally and physically fit. It’s an awful life and you’re right to be concerned.