Hey! So 1. I guess it is kinda true that I don't truly care whether you kill yourself. The world is full of way more horrible things than that, and we all die eventually so ultimately, it ends up not being a big deal. Here are some thoughts though:
2. You posted on reddit. You didn't have to, you could've quietly killed yourself but perhaps, even somewhere way deep inside yourself you were looking for help.
3. You say you want to kill yourself after you graduate. Why wait? If you were 100% sure, then there's no need for that degree and you'd just go ahead and do it. Again, I think, even if you maybe even don't realize it, there's a part of you wanting help. 4. You say you have a pointless degree. Maybe. There are many degree fields that are complete bs and a waste of time and money. BUT even those are a bachelor's degree from somewhere. We live in a world where what, a billion people live in abject poverty and have barely any education at all. Plenty more than that who have some education but not high school. Many more than that who don't do any university. Only ~30% of the US has a bachelor's degree so even if you think your specific degree field is worthless, it is completely untrue that the degree itself isn't worth A LOT. Definitely not trying to be mean, but factually you have had a lot of privilege that many others have not had. You are educated and speak English and live in the first world. THAT IS LITERALLY THE STUFF OF DREAMS to hundreds of millions of people. You don't have to care about that, but you do need to realize that it's true.
5. You mention the bad job market and that it is going to get worse. Again, true and maybe. But wow, definitely not for sure!! The world is moving at SUCH a rapid pace now, who knows what it's going to be like in 5-10+ years. Some people talk about robots and automation killing jobs, but the industrial revolution created a wealth explosion and more automation only makes more wealth (and not pointless wealth like expensive sunglasses but wealth as in better healthcare, necessities for living, etc). Yes there are greedy people and we don't have it all figured out but truly, most regular "poor" in most industrialized societies are far richer now than the middle class 100+ years ago. 6. Sooo if we're richer now, why aren't we all happy? Why does it seem like everyone is depressed now a days? Because we're so disconnected! We were made to live in true communities and be much more attuned to each other and nature. What is typical now is to live either all alone or with just a few people in a wooden box completely separate from nature. We truly are not supposed to live like that. That truth may not help anything, but you don't know the societal changes that will soon happen. Already the "tiny house" movement is a pretty big thing. Much more logically than that though, is a not tiny, but much more in-nature living situation. Instead of 2000 square feet of inside living space and never being outside, we already are moving back to having a lot more outdoor living areas. This is good and will continue to grow and will absolutely help our collective mental health.
As far as living alone, etc, I don't really know what's coming with that, but I do know that it is unnatural to be alone. We are meant to be with other people. So whether it's online or in person, connect with other people around whatever subject that kinda makes you happy.
7. On that note, yes, try to do things that make you happy. Watch funny non mean to other people videos on youtube. I personally love watching buzzfeed or other videos of people trying different food, etc and having a funny reaction. It makes us happy to see other people be happy. If you think it's stupid, wtfever, watch anyway, or at least find something you do enjoy. 8. I just read this and I don't want to rewrite what I already wrote so I'll add it here. You said "distract my mind enough from the loneliness". EXACTLY! You're lonely. We are not meant to be so apart from other humans. We simply aren't designed that way. Over time we have started literally walling ourselves away from each other but it is SO unnatural. Get out, see people, or again, at least watch some people having fun online. It probably won't make you instantly excellent, but its a step in the right direction. If you're lonely as in you want a significant other, I'm not going to get into all that right now, but you're young, there are SOOO many ways to develop yourself and find someone.
9. Things might seem bad now but you don't know what the future holds. You are smart enough to be an almost graduate of college. You don't know that perhaps by trying to pull yourself out of this funk, that you won't somehow end up finding something (and someone) you really love and end up saving the world, or at least end up being truly happy. There are many people who have been suicidal who end up leading very happy lives. You're young and have many options a lot of people don't have. There's no reason to think you can't turn everything around.
That's all for now. Good luck, message me anytime, namaste!