I'm not diagnosed yet but often wonder if I actually am a real loner that does not want to have company or am just too exhausted to keep trying and hence prefer to be a loner.

I personally do not have any real interest in 99% of the people I meet, but if I meet someone interesting I get obsessed over them and that never did end good and eventually did give me a lot of anxiety.

Either people got creeped out or had not much interest in me in the first place and I felt rejected.

Not talking about sexual or romantic relationships here even, but simply about people I find have an interesting character or I like the things they talk about, the way they talk and explain things, their general attitude etc.

I'm 41 now and basically have been a hermit more or less for 16 years by now and by now I don't even know anymore how to interact with people and I get annoyed easily.