I was diagnosed with PTSD about 3 years ago, and after working with a therapist I recalled an event I had forgotten about that caused it. Honestly though, therapy doesn’t really help much beyond that initial realization. And I understand that feeling of confusion, of not knowing who you are. I was there.

At a certain point, you have to make a choice. You aren’t going to magically make the anxiety go away, or the nightmares stop. That takes ages, and life won’t just stop for you to fix yourself like that. Instead, just get up and do what you have to do. Go to work. Spend time with friends. Live your life. If you get those thoughts & fears, accept that they are happening, know that the brain has millions upon millions of thoughts an hour and these are just a part of that process, and keep going about your day.

Even if you feel horrible and doing those things absolutely sucks, it’s still better than laying in bed feeling scared all day. Over time, keeping busy will make anxiety lesser, if not just easier to ignore because you’re someone who has shit to do. Drugs don’t really help with this, and side effects aren’t worth the risk. It’s a mental choice you have to make.