He doesn't have to "man up" and come home with a smile on his face. But he should forgive her for this comment. Yes, of course he lost a baby too. And it is devastating for both parties involved. I lost a daughter at six months. And I was terrible, awful, for me and for my husband. It was the worse loss I've ever experienced and I lost my mother at 18 to suicide and my father to cancer at 20 so I am familiar with loss. But, I hate to say this but it's true it is different when you are the mother, you were the one who carried the child, felt that child kick and grow inside of you, saw your body change, bonded with that child in ways your SO simply could not have yet because he was not pregnant. I am sure he was there for the birth and that is traumatic but she also birthed the child. And then there are raging hormones and your milk comes in and there is no baby there, just empty arms. Given the shitty circumstances all around, I think in this one particular case she owes her SO a huge apology and it does sound like she is remorseful. They certainly should go to couples therapy and there are grief counselors who specialize in baby loss. But he should also forgive her for this comment. I mean, it's a shitty thing to say but it's a shitty thing to ditch your SO after you both lost a child and she is looking at an empty nursery every day. Also, she is angry in general, angry this happened at all, I can relate to that. So in the heat of the moment, she decided to place that anger on the one person she can trust, and who is there for her -maybe she thought he could handle the anger and the burden for a moment or two, carry that load for her. It's not right to say - at all - but as someone who was in a very similar situation only at 6 months not 7 I can see saying this. Hormones, depression, anger, needing a scapegoat, using the one "safe" person you can trust, wanting them to feel the same exact grief and pain as you which they cant because they didn't carry the child and they can have the same postpartum experience as you...he should at the very least listen to her and go to counseling with her.