I want to preface that going NC is an incredibly personal decision and one that is more easily done in stages. I slowly curbed contact over several years as I went through my own personal healing process. I admire your support for your SO. Part of that support is understanding that only they can make that decision for themselves, and it may take a lot of time. This is my story of how I cut off the majority of my abusive or enabling family members over the course of 9 years.

My mother suffered a massive mental break down around the time I was 6 years old. She self admitted into a mental health institute for six months and returned a different person. I grew up in a very loving home as far as I remember it up until that point. After that my mother was neglectful, physically and verbally abusive, and incredibly emotionally manipulative. She was diagnosed with manic depression, and spent the rest of my childhood on various anti-depressants.

A multitude of abuse culminated in my being thrown out at the age of 17 because I chose to go to a different college than she wanted. At this point in my life, I had a close step-father and grandmother who supported her decision, as well as distant relatives who were neutral or slightly supportive. I ended up living with a friend for a couple months and then with her again for a couple months before going to college. This began the process of going LC and eventually NC. I moved far enough away that driving to visit me was not an option. Also, I now controlled my time enough to choose when I called her or answered her calls. I can't stress how important physical distance is to comfortably transitioning to LC or NC. Without such a physical barrier