My Best Friends Husband keeps hitting on me.

DISCLAIMER: I'm a guy.

This is my first time posting to this sub, but I lurk a lot. I have 3 big problems with this. First...

kept rubbing my stomach asking me if my scar still hurt. And that was while his wife was still awake.

What do you mean kept? That sounds to me like he did it more than 2-3 times. I can see the first time, you joking it off and saying stop (hopefully at least you did that). The second time, you should have made it clear that this isn't a game. The third time doing it is crossing the line in no uncertain terms. This leads me to believe you did not make it clear you didn't want him touching you. If i'm out with the guys and some dudes wife starts feeling me up, she's going to know the FIRST time it's not cool. I'm sure this is also how my wife would handle herself. Then his wife goes to sleep and you keep hanging out with her grab-happy husband? What's that about?

Second...

I tried to tell my husband about it and he just says that I shouldn't get myself into these situations.

I have two issues with this part. First is his response about getting yourself into these situations. I don't know, this just kind of screams that this sort of thing has happened before. The second part is how so many people are shouting about HOW HE RESPONDED. How he should go say something or do something. Okay ladies, let me explain it this way. If it is to the point that I have to go say something to some dude because my wife could not make it clear that he is crossing the line, it is likely to the point that blood could easily be spilled. How many guys are in prison, dead, or maimed because they had to go "say" something to some guy? So lets imagine her husband goes and says to this guy..."I don't appreciate you touching my wife and neither does she. Keep your hands to yourself". Now, what if this guy is the macho type and tells him to fuck off? Or worse, he's the violent type and gets in his face...pushes him...punches him...etc? What is he supposed to do? Get beat up? Beat the crap out of the guy? What happens if he beats the shit out of him and the guy presses charges? Now he's supposed to go to jail? This is not an exaggeration. It happened to an acquaintance. These things escalate quickly. Some of these responses are correct and he SHOULD stand up for you, but only after you have stood up for yourself to avoid a situation where he now has to possibly beat the fuck out a guy (or get beat up, or killed). I'm pretty certain my wife would rake her nails across the face of some dude that she had to tell more than once to not feel her up. I don't feel like you stood up for yourself here.

Then you get into a car with the grab-happy husband of your sleeping best friend? The grab-happy husband who has clearly displayed he doesn't know how to take no for an answer by feeling up your tummy over and over after you tell him to stop (I mean, you did say no, and stop, over and over after he KEPT touching you in an inappropriate way, right?). You...got...into...a...car...by...yourself...with...him...voluntarily.

As for you being a former cam girl, that shouldn't have anything to do with anything. I wouldn't care if you were a former hooker, crossing the line is crossing the line. This situation is about you and you not setting clear boundaries. Like, what the fuck was his wife doing while you sat there and clearly told him that his touching you was not cool and making you uncomfortable?

Lastly...I just really want to hammer home this point and make it clear for everyone. You voluntarily got into the car of someone who is being sexually aggressive toward you!!! By yourself.

He insisted on driving me and I let him.

I suppose he also insisted on feeling you up and you let him?

What do I do now?

You should face the fact that you handled this situation all wrong. You should block his number from being able to text you. That is boundary #1. You shouldn't be texting with your best friends husband who clearly wants to fuck you. You shouldn't hang around him anymore whether your friend is awake or asleep. That's boundary #2. If he crosses these boundaries let his wife handle it. If she doesn't want to get involved or takes his side, cut her off and find some new friends. Some friends with a backbone who aren't going to let their husbands feel you up.

Let the downvotes commence.

/r/TwoXChromosomes Thread