Hey man, I just want to tell you, you're not a pile of shit by any means. From I've read it sounds like you're just a bit overwhelmed and that you aren't getting a lot of support from other people.

May I ask what makes your schedule so long? It sounds like you have a bit much on your plate (which is fine, lot's of people do).

I want to make it clear that your future is yours and yours alone. You're the one that will be making decisions about who you are and about where you go and what you do. I know your mom has a lot of control over you now, but trust me, that can change very quickly once you are 18. Your job is not to support your family financially, unless that's what you choose to do. But your life shouldn't be built around that.

Do what you want to do. Not every passion can make money, but there a tons of helpful people on Reddit that can hear what you are passionate about, What you're good at, and find jobs that more or less fit the passion.

Remember that your situation is based on random luck right now, not who you are. Once you get older you can make your own life, and not worry about people you don't want to. Keep pushing through man.