I am similar except for dropping out of society. Except I actually had to do that when I hurt my back. I used to be a division 1 athlete and then I herniated a disc in my back. You know how that happened? Randomly one day while doing a box jump. A fucking box jump. Literally got struck down by God or something. Now I have chronic pain and arthritis in the lower back with repeated aggravations. You can definitely get back into shape. Especially when I did it with chronic back pain. Being a former athlete makes it 100x easier also.
I am so sorry to hear that. I could probably get back into shape, but I am just so apathetic all the time. I feel like I will never gain back the drive I used to have. I feel like a completely different person, both physically and mentally. I just don't see the point in anything, which is the opposite of what I used to be like.
Bullies are fuckers. I've gotten bullied and made fun of fairly often. These people are often over-aggressive fuckheads that have no empathy or maturity. It has definitely affected me also. I am fairly timid and have anxiety so you can imagine this compounded it. Unfortunately with so many people in the world - there are bound to be a few shitheads that feel the need to bring others down. Is there any way to avoid the people that are bringing you down?
Sorry to hear you have had similar experiences. I feel like the kind-hearted, sensitive people are always taken advantage of, it makes me so angry. There was only one girl who treated me badly, but I am not around her anymore. She treated me badly because I was more fit, prettier and got higher grades than her, and I know it stemmed from her insecurity about herself. Ironically, she has now become a fitness-junkie, while I am more out of shape than ever. Which makes me furious. Petty, I know.. But we used to be close friends before she suddenly turned her back on me when she saw me as competition.
This one is hard and I am currently struggling with this also. If I am contemplating suicide daily how am I supposed to be interested in some inane bullshit about how B cells mature in the lymph node? One of my hopes is that medication will help. I would maybe advise that you sort out depression/suicidal thoughts before heading to college. More stress will bury you. It's burying me right now anyway
Exactly, I really can't concentrate at all. Every time I open a book my thoughts starts wandering towards suicide or anger about my situation. I have already tried medication and quit because of the side effects, and therapy doesn't help either. Ultimately, I am just so bitter about everything. I also feel like my bouts of depression makes me see other things clearly too. I recently found out about someone close to me cheating on and lying to their spouse. All the evil in the world makes me so sad and even more unmotivated than I already am.