Well my girl and I are back together apparently. She said she is done "playing it cool and pretending she isn't interested." She point blank said though that she is not committing to me until I am in Miami and am financially stable. I made it clear that I understood her reasoning and that I am not interested in trying to control her from Ohio, but it would still not be appropriate for her to ride the cock carosel until I get there. She reassured me she is not interested in that. So we will see how this goes it's going to be day by day. In the meantime I'm not going to be looking for anything other than a job but I don't think I would say no if a pussy opportunity fell into my lap either.
Shortly after giving me the job lecture she started talking about a movie she watched a year ago which reminded her of me. The Place Behind the Pines. She wanted me to see it watched it together on Facetime. Ryan Gosling (gringo like me) knocks up Eva Mendes (Cuban like her) and tries to support them by robbing banks.
Not so subtle hint to me. Okay sweetheart. I know how to hustle when I need to so if I don't have to hide some chemistry schemes I've been thinking about for supplemental income from her that will make things easier.
Job search is still going terrible. Got a few replies today "we don't do relocators sorry." As if I didn't have enough pressure to find a job immediately just for freedom and personal livelihood now I need to lock down my woman. God I hate this process so much. Fuck time wasters and people who aren't serious. I'm trying to get shit done here and don't need any more bullshit.
On a lighter note it was nice as hell just to talk about nothing again with her on Facetime for hours. At one point at like 3 in the morning I realized i had nodded off for a second and so had she. It was my first time ever seeing her sleep actually. We dated for nearly a year and fucked like rabbits but never actually slept together. Her parents had a strict curfew for her and she went home every single night to sleep in her own bed. I'm actually really looking forward to the first time I can go to sleep and wake up next to her.
I'm looking forward to a lot of the other subtle non-sexual aspects of a relationship that I've been missing. The pillow talk. Morning coffee, breakfast, and brushing teeth. Getting home from a night out and talking shit about strangers and our friends. Shopping for stupid shit we want.
Unlike my last 2 gf's she doesn't have horrific anxiety. Things that should have been a great part of a relationship were miserable because I was constantly walking on eggshells. My Dad has it too so I'm still dealing with this shit daily. So not only to I badly want to get out on my own and link up with my girl I need to desperately get the fuck out of my parents house. But it's waiting waiting waiting waiting on people and the 'process.'