I mean, I have loved and lost tho. I just meant I’ve never done irl ‘dating’ - just a couple long distance relationships and both of them were terrible humans. So I gave up. Last one ended with me dropping out of college right after I got accepted into a real university, after 4 semesters in tech. I sat in my room for 6 months and did nothing. I just watched the semester go by and did no work. Started popping pills and drinking due to depression.

Obviously not the answer to depression, I still haven’t figured that out. People say therapy but I don’t really see how someone can help me by telling me to “make a list and set goals for myself.” Won’t matter if I have no drive to do the shit in the first place.

I finally feel like I’m relatively normal again now, it took a long fucking time over some asshole who wasn’t in my life all but 8 months.

So yeah after my last two psychos I’m good. And that was just girls I met online, in my communities. Both were manipulative and psychotic. I just have bad luck lol.. shoulda learned after the first one.