That's easy for you to fucking say on the internet you cunt. That's also deciding to lose a friend and I know that. fucking get off your high horse talking to me like I am a piece of shit for trying to respect her decisions and not undermine her own existing plans. I have done nearly everything on this govt list for family violence.

If you know or suspect someone is being intimidated, controlled or hurt, find out what you can do to help. It's OK to get involved – you could save a life. If children are being hurt they need adults to step in and take charge of their safety. They need to be able to tell adults they can trust what is happening to them. Say things like: Are you ok? Is someone hurting you? Is there anything I can do? If you want suspect someone is being hurt: give support not advice listen take violence seriously don't tell them what to do let them make their own decisions however long it takes BUT call 111 if you think someone is in danger. Adults living with violence need support to make decisions in their own time when they are ready. It's important to go at their pace. Adults affected by family violence feel a lot of shame whether they are being violent or being hurt. They need to make changes in their own time when they are ready. Children need to be protected from violence happening in their homes – they need adults around them to keep them safe. The sooner you reach out to someone living with family violence the sooner they can get help.

If you want to talk to your friend or family member about the violence, it's best to pick a quiet time – not when the violence is happening. If you want to help someone who you suspect is violent, challenge the behaviour not the person. Say things like: Can I help? Do you need to talk? It's not OK your kids are scared of you. The sooner you reach out to someone who is being violent the sooner they can get help to change.

Notice the fucking support instead of force your ideas on them. keyboard fuckwit