Brady goes down in the first series. Very next snap, Hoyer is down for the count. Hoody goes over the head of Belichick and he puts Chris Hogan, Rex Buckhead, Matthew Slater, and even a handful of defensive backs in as quarterback; yet each goes down one after quarterback. As Gronk slips on a QB Coach wrist pad, a twinkle in the stand catches an personal trainer's eye. He starts yelling, as a skinny man who just popped a molly begins walking onto the field. It's Johnny Manziel, followed by an agent. He signs a quick contract and goes in at halftime. He throws for 22 touchdowns and 1,652 yards setting the field on fire.

Literally, the field is on fire.