Yeah because these people are ALSO not paying attention to what Im actually asking, and instead telling me to try the same thing I HAVE ALREADY TRIED SEVEN TIMES. And most of you guys are even telling me that Im right, most therapists actually do suck! Yet you are somehow magically expecting me to find the "right" therapist if I just keep looking, even though if you actually read my post you would see that I can find almost no therapists AT ALL in my area, who accept my insurance, have available hours at a time that I could feasibly go to for the next year, and have good reviews from patients. Never mind if they are a "good fit" for me or not. Even if I WANTED to go to therapy, it is statistically unlikely that I could find one who would work for me. I have spent several hours searching already. Yet everyone keeps giving me the SAME FUCKING ADVICE even though I specifically asked for advice on something completely different. Wouldnt you get pissed off if you asked for advice on Topic X and everyone started giving you advice on Topics Y and Z and then accused you of being too mentally ill to think clearly when you understandably got annoyed at them?
No I havent "tried self-help." I havent done extensive reading on methods of psychological therapy, using the resources used by actual psychologists. Which is what I currently intend to do. Thats WHY I was asking for advice on what the best resources are to do this and where I can find them, and how I should go about such an endeavor. And only a couple of people actually gave me a response to what I asked in the first place.
However, you know what I HAVE tried? With at least 7 therapists over the course of 14 years, none of which ever did a damn thing for me? THERAPY. So why does everyone keep telling me to try therapy when I have ALREADY TRIED it, when they actually AGREE with me that most therapists suck, when it is NOT FEASIBLE for me to even find one I can go to consistently, let alone a GOOD one?
And medication is non-negotiable. I already have researched these medications extensively, most likely much more than you ever have. I have read hundreds of accounts of peoples' experiences taking them and read about the class action lawsuits that have been filed and the suicides and homicides caused by those drugs. Everyone Ive known who has ever taken them, has been destroyed from them. I am not going to take psych meds. End of story. Even when I was suicidal, I chose to live with depression because that was preferable to putting those poisons in my body. And my husband, who has taken antidepressants, benzos, Adderall, and even Risperdal for a short time, completely agrees with me that these drugs are toxins that cause more problems than they solve. If you think you are going to convince me to go on medication with your "negging" and condescending attitude, then you are barking up the wrong tree because it's simply not going to happen. Nobody is ever going to convince me to destroy my mind and body with those poisons. So either respect my boundaries or go away.
I DONT NEED TO BE TOLD THAT THERAPY EXISTS. I DONT NEED TO BE TOLD THAT MEDICATIONS EXIST. I WANT ADVICE ON THE BEST RESOURCES AND STRATEGIES FOR TEACHING MYSELF THERAPEUTIC SKILLS. If you dont have this type of advice, then find another thread to propagandize on.
And once again, there you go applying your own life experiences to my situation! You really find it impossible to see someone else's perspective or respect someone else's opinions, dont you? I AM NOT YOU, MY THOUGHTS ARE NOT THE SAME AS YOURS AND MY SITUATION IS NOT THE SAME AS YOURS. Why do you find that so impossible to understand?