Isn't it? Is it not the truth? A woman can't be fat and bitchy? lmao.
That's because I am a high libido misogynist pig who can't relate to someone who is clearly not satisfied with their family life who instead of focusing on improving himself and his relationship immediately goes to Reddit for armchair psychiatry about what's wrong with his wife. Maybe nothing is wrong with her. Maybe she's like this because she's just bored as fuck because OP won't initiate sex with her. My wife can call me a dickhead asshole stubborn piece of shit and she's not wrong but at the end of the day she wants to jump my bones because despite my assholishness she knows without a doubt that I think she's the sexiest mother of two in the world and we're both happier for it. I can't imagine not trying to initiate with her for more than 1 day let alone an entire week. Sorry for triggering you.
Back to OP
Yes 1 in 5. That's the high end. The low end is once a week and that is encompassing men over 70 years old where low libido can be expected.
OP is half the frequency of the low end and essentially at his peak physically at 25. OP has incredibly low to nonexistant libido.
Fix that first. Take a newfound interest in your wife's sexuality. She doesn't feel attractive because as OP already admitted he is not attracted to her because "she's just mom now." That is so incredibly unhealthy in a marriage.
OP you had the perfect opportunity to get back on track by initiating sex after the heart to heart talk. Instead you suggest therapy. Probably made her feel worse. OP is completely uninterested in having sexual relations with the woman he entered into a legal contract with to be in a relationship for the rest of his life. Yet we are trying to find what's wrong with HER?
My point is there are other issues at play here. That's why I asked about OPs general health. If dude is working 10 hour days at a desk, never exercises, is overweight, eats low quality food, comes home plays with baby for an hour, then plays PS4 for 6 hours until 2 am ignoring his wife and losing crucial sleep it's no wonder his libido is gone and his wife feels unattractive and depressed due to a complete lack of sexual attention mixed with stress of raising a 1 year old.