I'm also a 35F single parent with a 10F (and a 12M). My daughter and a friend of hers would 'lightly' flirt(no graphic language or blatant sex talk) and try and get the attention of boys on Instagram. Her friend seemed much more 'boy crazy', but my daughter was also into it, albeit on a smaller scale. They are curious and reveling in the attention they're getting from boys. My daughter will post on her Instagram account pics that say things like..press 1 if you think I'm pretty, 2 if I am popular, 3 if I am funny, etc. I just had a talk with her last night saying how awesome I think she is and she doesn't need to keep posting things that are fishing for compliments from her IG followers...but I guess they're just at that age to be curious..and she wants to be complimented by her peers, not just her mom. They also are constantly bombarded with images of what being a female means on tv, internet, etc. They are probably trying to live up to and emulate what they're seeing.

All that being said, if I saw messages that were sexually explicit from or to my 10 yr old, I'd probably throw up. Once I regained my composure, I'd talk with her and let her know its probably a creepy old man behind the screen and not a 10 yr old boy. I'd also take away internet access for a while and when I felt she was ready to have access returned, I'd make sure she could only do so in my presence..not alone in her room.

You aren't a bad parent because this happened..you love your daughter, and these types of things happen in our internet hyper connected society. You did the right thing by talking to her and restricting internet access.

Have a virtual hug from another mom trying to navigate preteen-dom.