I am 35 no job, live with my mom and currently on trade school. I ruined my father by using a credit line irresponsibly, I ruined my career due to joining my uncle and cousins on drinking and smoking weed. I lost my business due to immaturity. It took me way too long to realize what I was doing.

You are being way too hard on yourself. If you are studying and are actually applied and responsible with it, then it is the equivalent of working.

You are responsible and doing your best at college. You work on your own/freelance when you can and spend your money wisely. You haven't broken many rules and as such haven't caused much pain to your parents and I bet that they are proud of you.

Don't call yourself a loser.