I grew up in a hardcore religious home believing in hell too. I still believe in God, but I no longer believe the Bible is “the infallible word of God.” That’s how they keep control - making you believe that any original thought is sinful and only they can correctly interpret the infallible bible. The most dangerous religions are the ones that claims they have it all figured out perfectly and everyone else is wrong.

Turns out, the Bible was written by humans who were desperately trying to figure out life with very limited understanding of it. Half the stuff in there was clearly written with an agenda or even just out of fear. It was also written in human language and must be interpreted by humans, so even if it was meant to be “God’s word,” there’s 2 layers of unavoidable fallibility on top of it. It’s still a helpful book, in a way, but people should look at it as a history book - a chronicle of mistakes and crudely-drawn conclusions.

If you want to continue believing in God, the one thing you can rest easy with is Jesus’ main message to “love one another,” which he himself said is more important than anything else. (Shit, he even showed love and forgiveness toward the soldiers and mob while they were torturing and killing him.) When I accepted that that is the one thing that matters and guides everything else, I realized that the fundamentalists who shove fear down your throat are the ones in the wrong, because their actions ultimately undermine love and stoke hate for the “others.”

And most importantly, I can now accept that people can love each other no matter what they believe. There doesn’t need to be other strings attached. Plenty of atheists are better Christians than self-proclaimed Christians...