I think it has something to do with the way girls are socialized, honestly.

I was once a teenaged girl, but my dad was stay at home and my mom worked. Dad doesn't give a shit what people think, mom does. So I was never particularly concerned about appearances or maintaing a facade, like my dad, where my mother is constantly anxious about what people think of me.

Most girls I befriended were sort of the same way at first, but their moms were the ones who were pushing them to be popular. One friend's mom said something bitchy about the fact that I didn't (and still don't) wear makeup daily. :/// The girls who were the nastiest to me always had the most controlling mothers who clearly hadn't gotten the memo that they weren't 16 anymore, and the girls who were my friends were usually the ones whose mothers were less involved in their upbringing either due to work or just not being there. Or their moms were just really fucking zen.

I think a lot of the hyperbitchiness that teenage girls go through comes from a pressure to "fit in" since the way most girls excel is through social things like, clubs and whatnot. So it's some Game of Thrones shit to stay on top or force your way up to the top, with their mothers standing behind them as a coach, encouraging them to backstab their friends and ditch what they think is dead weight, downplay how smart they are and pick up a rich boyfriend. These are all actual things I'd overhear while hanging out at my friend's places.

Whereas guys, at least in my experiences, flat out don't give a fuck and are more complacent about the status quo. Their dads usually push them to do sports or be physically active, but from the outside looking in they're all about wanting a "team" experience than single-handed glory. And if they don't do sports, then they'll find some other way to have a team or a group.

I think the best example I've got is two separate scenarios from my first school. It was a school of about 300 students, probably less, in a town full of people had been born, raised, and would die in. The school had a rampant drug problem and the administration was fucked leftways from Sunday. I mean -- most teachers had at least three kids in the school, and there was nothing to stop parental bias. I was a smart kid with halfway decent acting and singing talent and that was the stupidest thing to do in such a small school where everyone is competing for social dominance and school plays are vital. I was bullied because I befriended most of the mentally challenged kids and invited them to play with me and my friends... and also because one teacher borderline abused my severely autistic cousin and thought it was "funny" to try to do the same to me for some reason? Like... who the fuck encourages kids to throw backpacks in front of a kid with autism as "roadblocks". How can you find it amusing, as an educator and a guardian for these kids, when he starts to get worked up and upset that he can't get to the front of the fucking class because he has this ONE very specific path and suddenly can't take it? How can you do that in good conscience when you know you're just teaching kids it's okay to do that to others??

Uh. Anyway. I digress. That's the kind of environment this school was.

I was an androgynous kid with short hair, with no balance due to fucked up inner ears ears, who liked to rough house, read books, and watch anime. I had a bad habit of shooting my mouth off when I felt that something was morally objectionable, and had a big sad bleeding heart. This is the stage that has been set.

Best guy friend's mom thought that I was somehow "making him gay" and was the reason he didn't have many friends. He told her to stuff it and we're still close friends to this day. That's the end of the story.

Best female friend's mom said that I was making her gay (which is hilarious, because i was so far in the fucking closet i was having tea with mr tumnus and she was the one who kept asking me out) and was probably the reason she didn't have many friends. She fucked me over pretty severely in order to get into the popular clique, then felt immediate regret and tried to apologize... but we never properly made up for it. The popular girls ditched her very shortly afterwards and she fell in with a really bad crowd. Her mom realized shortly thereafter that I was almost solely responsible for making sure her kid passed classes and attended school and not-so-subtly hinted that I should start coming over again. I'd already transferred schools and made new friends, so y'know... too late. When we tried to hang out, it was clear the trust was gone and would never come back.

Best dude friend and I went on to attend the same college in the same field (art), whereas former female best friend never went on to college and started stealing money from where she worked. I'd have counted that as a one-off incident, but the pattern happened more than a few times.