My mom has paranoid schizophrenia and says that no one can help her and refuses to take her medication. Even though when she is on it, she is much better. She refused to come to my house and see her 1 yr old and 3 year old grandsons on Mother's Day. She spends her whole social security check on cigarettes, frequently overdraws her account, and is always asking for money. When I was 11 she tried to kill my younger brother, sister and I. Every holiday is like grieving the loss of my mom again. I know that it's her illness that makes her this way, but I can't help but blame her for her selfishness of not trying at least a small amount to get better. She doesn't shower or do laundry, or clean her house. She just sits and drinks coffee, smokes cigarettes, stares off in space, with a knife next to her while the tv is going. I've given her every opportunity in the world to get help, but she refuses now. I've had her committed before but she is usually out in 3 days and it has no lasting effect. Our state keeps cutting all mental health benefits, and it is impossible to get any help.