So they stand there and they say things like, " Have you tried climbing out?" " Will a rope help?" " Have you tried imagining that it's not a hole?" "Maybe if you approach the hole differently..." And people get frustrated. Frustrated that you're not taking their advice, or frustrated that it's not helping. Frustration that turns into impatience because it isn't solving the problem. You're still stuck in the hole, and when you're too tired to try their suggestions in good faith anymore, or you're frustrated and you start telling them it just won't work ,then everyone's just frustrated. And then it starts to look like you just don't want the help. So out of frustration, they start telling you that they can't help you unless you want the help. Or things won't change unless you want to change.

This is exactly what happened to me. And eventually I started to respond that I didn't think I wanted to get better anymore. I lost a lot of friends and it hurt. I still feel sad about it. Some just stopped talking to me. So i understand, if that means anything :/

Your family was awful :/ and they abused and neglected you so much. if you need to talk about anything at all, we are here, even though i don't know what to say. if you were my friend in real life, I'd probably just sit there and listen and probably offer you a drink tbh :/

I've been told flat out not to tell one of my friends any of it because he can't handle it. Or process it, and he can't do anything to fix it, so he just doesn't want to hear it because he has too much else going on. I understand. So I try, very hard, all the time, to just not mention it.

I had friends basically say the same thing. don't talk about it. but if you need anything, call me. but if you don't act or feel or think the right way, i'm just going to get frustrated when you don't seek help enough.

:/ if you want to talk, i will try to listen :/