Hey, Vsauce! Michael here. What if you could take a person...and multiply them? You could, say, get things done around the house quicker, or, finally finish that fence you were building. Or, you could have sex with them.
The human body has long been thought of by scientists as what's called an Schwarzchild Insertion Matrix, or SIM. It's a visual representation of all the potential places on a human body where a penis, vagina or mouth could fit. Sir Isaac Newton first theorized that humans had a SIM of just...one. It was unfathomable at the time to suggest that the human body was capable of multiple points on the matrix.
So what would happen if you, a male, tried to put your penis in somewhere undefined by the Schwarzchild Insertion Matrix? Would you, say, cause a black hole from the sheer violation of spacetime? Or...would you multiply someone?
In 1969, a group of researchers at Bell Laboratories released a study where they found that stimulating an area other than someone's traditional areas on the SIM...left those spaces open. It was theorized that you could then take another person, another human, and then use them to stimulate that traditional area on the SIM. It's like driving your car in the vacuum of space, and seeing a parking spot specifically for your exact car. Ordinarily you would just park your car in your spot. Except this time...the space is full.
Let's say this time you drove your car in this vacuum parking lot a a little further down. According to the known laws of physics, there shouldn't be another spot where you can park. However, as you keep driving, you see something...strange. All these new parking spots begin to appear out of nowhere. All these spots you can park your car. All these new places... to insert yourself.
It was postulated that were a human body to be stimulated on, or, inserted upon in an area traditionally undefined by the SIM, you could then take a theoretically infinite amount of people and use them in a theoretically infinite number of spaces on human bodies.
It sounds impossible. The human body only has a finite surface area. It seemed like Bell Labs' study ended there.
Then, in 2006, two Dutch physicists cracked the code. Ronald Jeremy and Remy LaCroix developed the "Omnified Reactive Gradient Yield", or ORGY. They discovered a formula to turn a finite amount of space onto the human body...into an infinite one. It was determined that the number of viable spaces in a human body was relatively finite, but when you added another body, the available spaces doubled. The more people you include in this stimulatory session, the more available points and surfaces bodies have to work with. You could insert yourself into another person's butt and exponentially increase the entire group's potential for stimulation, by means of your own butt and mouth.
So, what would happen if an infinite number of people did congregate in such a way as to fulfill the ORGY's maximum boundaries?
...we don't know.
In a time where media like Tinder, and Pornhub draw our interests away from mass physical contact, scientists have never been able to figure out the upper bounds of an ORGY. In 2013 a group of Canadian students tried to successfully solve the upper bounds problem, and they left satisfied...but unfulfilled.
We might never know the upper limits of the ORGY, but we can at least take solace in the fact that today's partners can support more people than our ancestors even fathomed. And the next time you're having to clean the house, or, make love to someone, just think about the fact that your experience is better...when multiplied. Thanks for watching.