Get some new friends. These are toxic gays.

As a former hottie that lived in a big gay city, I understand these people, and despise them. I remember asking three older guys for career advice (they held senior roles in industries I wanted to pursue, and in my naivety thought they'd like to help a young grad student), only to get taken to dinner where it became clear they had no interest in helping my career unless the quid-pro-quo of being paraded around (and more) was on the table. So f*cking gross. I even fell for one a little (the first) who then made it clear he couldn't help me because we had compromised our professional relationship but he was happy to continue the personal one. Never felt so used. Yuck Yuck Yuck. The other two I paid for my half of dinner (despite it costing a half weeks salary at the time) and never spoke to again.

I now have amazing friends and nothing is transactional. We're all also 35+ and don't bother trying to keep up with the scene crowd. We also dump people from our circle pretty quick if they think being young and pretty means not paying their way, and I don't mean equal splits - I bring a bottle of Billicart because I can. Bring a bottle of Jacobs Creek if that's all you can afford - it's the gesture.